Hogwarts A Diary
by xClutteredxChaosx
Summary: Oh, look! They left the pages of their diary open! SSXHG DMXHG RWXHG My, god, Hermione! HPXGW etc
1. Hermione I

**Hermione's Diary**

_**I love the smell of a new diary…**_

**1****st**** September**

**3:46pm**

On the train. The only sounds I can hear are Ron and Harry's disgusting eating noises. Sounds like a mixture of a slobbering and snorting. Absolutely repulsive.

**3:55pm**

"Hermione wanta chocshlate fwrog?"

"No,"

Ew.

**4:50pm**

Malfoy just entered our cabin trying to flaunt his _head boy_ badge in front of Harry and Ron (who didn't actually give a pig's arse about it). It was going quite well for the blond hair twat until he saw the Head Girl Badge pinned to my robes. I actually thought he might try and murder me so another girl was chosen, it really looked like he was debating whether to do it or not. I wondered if Ron would protect me. He'd most likely run away.

The door slammed after at least three mud blood insults.

**5:00pm**

I had to patrol the corridors with him. I walked in on two third years snogging each other's faces off. My god, they were only thirteen.

**5:45pm**

Train arrived at Hogwarts. Met Ginny, Luna and Neville at the carriages. Harry and Ginny shared many glances. ('I went to the toilet in the middle of the night' PFFFT). I now know true reason for Ginny's empty sleeping bag at the burrow. I don't know what she's playing at. Harry needs to focus on killing Voldemort.

**6:00pm**

Waiting for the sorting hat. Nothing's changed. Got hit in the face by gravy, courtesy of Colin Creevey and his spoon. He tried to wipe by face with a napkin and poked me in the eye.

Was very annoyed at Ron's snorting.

"That was so funny," he guffawed stupidly.

Oh, dear god. I sent him my best glare, he actually had the decency to look slightly ashamed and patted me on the back. Hopefully he won't try anything more than back-pats this year. I think he's still getting over last year's Christmas when he asked me out and I said no. He kept trying to change my mind by hugging and touching me at every possible moment after.

I shifted up the bench.

**7:00pm**

Many new Gryffindors like always.

**7:05pm**

Dumbledore looked pleasantly happy. Perhaps it was because Madam Promfey cast a flying charm on him as he fell off Hogwart's roof. Must be awkward for him and Snape. Can't imagine what shite Snape got from Voldemort after. I wonder if Dumbledore is going to let himself be killed again. He'll probably lock Madam Promfey in the hospital wing first.

Professor Snape looked as disgusted as always by the many students in front of him.

I have no idea why that man is a teacher.

**10:00pm**

I'm slightly tipsy. Ron hoodwinked some of Fred and George's fire whisky into the castle and poured it into our drinks. It was very funny at the time, now it's annoying, I can't sleep.

Suppose I should try, I've got an eventful year ahead of me. I'm sorting out my revision timetable tomorrow.

**10:01pm**

_Oh my god, I forgot Crookshanks! _


	2. Draco I

**Draco's Diary**

**Written with my most expensive quill. Bought for me, by my father.**

**1****st**** September**

**3:50pm**

My father brought me the new Firebolt- seven hundred and twenty for becoming Head Boy. It was fairly obvious I would be anyway. He ordered it three months in advance.

**4:54pm**

_Holy God. _ My father has to know about this. MuddyGranger has been made Head Girl. It's preposterous.

**5:00pm**

I really would have _tried_ to see inside the carriages I was meant to look into while patrolling but I couldn't because of Granger's humongous, bushy head.

**5:01pm**

Granger is repulsed by kissing.

**5:45**

The train arrived.

I just saw a first year fall into the lake. Hah.

**6:00pm**

Extremely annoyed that Dumbledore is still alive.

**6:05pm**

Hopefully I'll get to miss school this year in order to see Voldemort. The lessons I learn from him are really very interesting.

Note to self, this diary must never be seen by anyone.

**6:10pm**

Am very fond of my dark mark.

**612pm**

Even if it's 'temporary'.

It still hurt like hell.

**6:13pm **

Can't wait until I acquire my real one.

**6:25pm**

Pansy isn't leaving me alone after I shagged her in the holidays. I'll have to quietly and discretely ditch her this year. She keeps latching herself onto my arm.

_And squeezing._

**6:26pm**

Maybe she knows.

**6:27**

No..no. I'm sure she doesn't.

**6:28pm**

Goyle looks very guilty whenever I look at him. That bastard better not have told any one. I'm sure he's just jealous. Voldemort said he was far too fat to be blessed with the dark mark.

**6:59pm**

I just unwillingly had to watch the twats sitting at the Gryffindor table. Why must they be in my line of vision?

**7:00pm**

Why is Weasley such an imbecile?

**7:10pm**

Pothead has turned into Cockhead. He's swimming in the fact that he now has the Slut Weasel as a girlfriend.

**7:15pm**

_Have only just noticed that I use insulting nicknames._

**7:17pm**

Granger's badge is glinting obscenely at me from across the hall. I'll have to do something about that.

**8:00pm**

That senile old crackheaded muggle lover is definitely losing his mind. He is holding another Yule Ball this Christmas. What JOY.

**8:30pm**

Granger fell over on the way out of the hall.

**8:32pm**

I did not trip her.

(Okay, I did.)

**8:45pm**

Come to think of it, she looked very drunk. Mudbloods can't even handle pumpkin juice, it's pathetic.

**9:00pm**

Just told the first years that they must go to bed at nine every night. That will get them out of the way for at least two terms.

**9:05pm**

Something just exploded.

**9:10pm**

Gave the culprit detention. I think I may be in love with my Head Boy badge.

**9:30pm**

What am I even doing writing in this diary? I'm becoming like a teenage girl.

At least it's made from the best leather around, my father bought me it.

**10:00pm**

Have made my bed a double bed.

**10:05**

Crabbe will have to sleep on the floor.

**11:00pm**

Goodnight.

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Thank you so much for the (3) reviews so far ! :)


	3. Severus I

**Severus' Diary**

_**I just found this old, worn out thing in my desk drawer. I can't let a perfectly good diary go to waste.**_

_**(It cost bloody ten gallons, I can see it on the price tag)**_

**September 2****nd**

**7:00am**

Miss Granger just ran past me with a terrified look on her face. Her hair looked unusually static and she seemed to be muttering about a cat. What strange, strange pupils we have.

**7:15am**

I Just took the first house point away of the year. The second day back, that is a new personal best for me. It was to a third year Hufflepuff who was eating with her hands. 1 point deducted.

**7:17am**

I went back and changed it to twenty points.

**7:30am**

I am sincerely grateful for McGonagall's presence between Albus and I at the dinner table. Things have been quite awkward for us lately. I would usually ignore it and carry on as normal, but things do change dramatically once you unsuccessfully try to kill someone.

**8:00am**

Just scrolling through this years timetable…

**8:03am**

Why is Neville Longbottom in my potions class?

**8:05am**

I specifically asked for him to be removed.

**8:10am**

Perhaps he will leave of his own accord once one of his potions explodes in his face.

New school year resolution: Make Longbottom's potion blow up in his face so that he will no longer feel the need to participate in my lesson.

**8:25am**

That was a joke. Haha, very funny of me.

Come to think of it, I shall write a list of all the things which I need to get done.

1) Stop Draco from being killed by Voldemort

2) Verbally abuse Potter

3) Mock Weasley

4) Heighten my current grade specifications and boundaries. (I gave away far too many A's last year)

5) Avoid the Yule Ball

6) If that is not possible, give at least ten detentions out at the Yule Ball

7) Strop drinking so much fire whisky. -Liver damage is a very serious thing.

8) Get some new cologne

9) Buy a new owl

10) Possibly kill Dumbledore, _again._

I'll have to ask Voldemort about that last one.

**4:00pm**

I am sick of teaching retarded idiots already. Fair enough, today _did_ consist of first and second year classes, but when it comes down to it, that really does make no difference at all. For example. Neville Longbottom.

**4:25pm**

Hmm, what is this?

**4:30pm**

Sick. It was _sick. _Someone had _puked_ outside of my classroom.

**5:00pm**

It really is unfortunate that Albus no longer allows beatings. I would have handed the culprit over to Filch in an instant.

**5:05pm**

I have just been informed that the magic in the school is going haywire due to a student bringing an Mp3 player into the building.

**5:10pm**

It has been fixed. The Mp3 player was taken away. The student was listening to an unknown muggle band called 'Placebo'

**5:12pm**

I just looked them up. The singer's voice is _horrendous!_

**6:00pm**

For once, I would like to eat my dinner in peace without a thousand eyes in front of me.

**6:01pm**

I hate him so much

**6:02pm**

I was talking about Potter

**6:03pm**

I think he's tried to bleach his scar-

Oh, no, no. His hair was just in the way. It was silly of me, really. Thinking Potter had tried to get rid of the one thing that made him famous. Arrogant _twat._

**11:00pm**

Well, that was a very good day. I hope you can hear the sarcasm dripping from my voice. I hate this place. I may resign tomorrow. Goodnight.

**11;01pm**

Jesus Christ I have that Placebo song in my head.

**11:02pm**

'_I'm coming up on infared, there is no running that can hide you, cause I can see in the dark...'_

**11:05pm**

Urgh. I think I may kill myself.

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_Thank you very much to everyone who has reviewed so far ! :)_


	4. Hermione II

**Hermione's Diary**

_**Oh no! It's raining!**_

**7:30pm**

Thank god! I managed to get Crookshanks back! He was actually squished inside my trunk at the end of my bed. I must have forgotten that I put him there, or he happened to crawl inside. Either way, when I opened it after sending a distraught letter to my parents, he came out looking very disgruntled.

**7:40pm**

I think Crookshanks took his anger out on Ron's bed hanging, because he came into the common room moaning about '_certain people's cats'_ looking directly at me '_slipping into people's dorm rooms'_ glaring at me, '_and shredding things to bits'_. He narrowed his eyes angrily at me and then walked into the wall.

**8:00pm**

Okay, so there is exactly three hundred and twenty four and three quarters of a quarter of school days left this year. That gives me roughly nine hundred and seventy two hours of revision. Oh dear, I hope I can get it all in.

**8:05pm**

Ronald is already moaning about defence against the dark arts homework. Harry is overjoyed that professor Lupin came back this year to teach it.

**8:07pm**

Oh my goodness. Have just been informed by the fat lady's shrieking voice that 'THERE IS SOMEONE WAITING OUTSIDE TO TALK TO HERMIONE GRANGER'

**8:10pm**

It was Malfoy, telling me that I was an hour later for out corridor patrolling session. Oh crap! (excuse my French) I just knew there was something else I was meant to be doing while I was pulling Crookshank's hair from my socks.

**8:15pm**

Ran upstairs to drag a comb through my hair and met a very irritated looking Malfoy outside.

"Have you just electrocuted yourself?" He asked snidely, staring mockingly at my hair. Why is he such a smarmy asshole?

"Have you just been drained of all blood?" I asked him. Albino twat.

**8:30**

We were walking around the hall, (Malfoy discreetly fuming about the fact that Gryffindor had ten more points that Slytheirn in the hourglasses) when two breathless first year Hufflepuffs charged into the hall in their pyjamas. Malfoy was seconds away from deducting points, before I lightly shoved him out of the way and asked the two (very terrified) looking boys what was wrong.

They exasperatedly told me that they had both had a nightmare where all the paintings on the wall were moving and one even reached out of their painting and pulled their hair. Bless them.

**9:00pm **

Told them that it was normal for the paintings to move. They went to bed looking more relaxed but still quite freaked. I hope they are ok.

'..Idiotc mudbloods," murmured Malfoy. "Shouldn't even be allowed in this bloody school,"

**9:02pm**

"Oh, just shut up,"

**9:03pm**

"Oh, getting tetchy are we, Granger?"

**9:04pm**

"I am not getting tetchy. I just find you extremely aggravating,"

**9:05pm**

"I think it's time for bed, Granger,"

**9:06pm**

"Ignorant twat,"

**10:00**

We parted ways with no more words spoken.

**10:00pm**

Hope he slipped on the way down to the dungeon.

**10:15pm**

When I reached the common room, Ron and Harry had fallen asleep in the chairs besides the fire, with a grand total of two combined sentences written on their parchment.

Ron had a large string of drool hanging from his chin.

**10:30pm**

Is exhausted. Is glad it is Friday tomorrow. On Saturday I am going into Hogsmeade with Ron and Harry, plan on getting a butter beer with chocolate sprinkles.

**10:33pm**

Goodnight. x


End file.
